How To: Once & For All End The Pesky, Recurring Dillemma of "Are the Dishes Dirty?"

I'd like to say I'm going to make my own (explicit, male) version of this but that would be a lie.
Cause I'm lazy.
But this is cute/interesting/funny/creative nevertheless. [futuregirl's gallery via Boing Boing]

Idea #3450-59634-0 Realized First By Others

I swear I was going to do this now that I live out in SoCal. Those Berkeley folks are such go-getters. Instead I just signed up for the event list for LA.

One day, when I have a creative idea, I'll just get to executing it instead of sitting on my butt.

Aquarium Pictures

I've been to 2 different aquariums (wait, no make that 3) in the past couple of months.
What's up with that?

Cuttlefish are weird and awesome.

Non News News Article

This pisses me off and freaks me out simultaneously - an AP "article" that is nothing more than a press release put out by Tom Cruises' camp of freaks. The headline itself acknowledges it has nothing to say: 'Tom Cruise Stays Hot in Hollywood' is not news and it's not even true. 'Tom Cruise is a Media-Manipulating Cult Member', while not news either (as in breaking news) is much more accurate an article to write.

I wonder if Sandy Cohen - the author of the "article" - tells people she is a "journalist", the way Tom Cruise is an "actor".

The "article" is unbelievably vapid. Here's one of the more useless quotes:

Cruise isn't just a major movie star. He's mastered the elusive art of staying hot in Hollywood.

It's a difficult achievement.

Actually, it's not.

For starters, announce out of the blue that you're dating somebody that no one really cares about. Dodge rumours that you actually had a short list of popular actresses who refused to enter into a contractual arrangement until a C/B list actress who needs the career bump finally accepts the terms. Repeatedly appear in magazines with this fake girlfriend. Go on TV and act like a dick about everything from Brooke Shields to psychiatry to said fake-girlfriend. Announce fake 10 month pregnancy and heavily document it. Time delivery of fake baby to coincide with release of shitty, pointless, Hollywood action extravaganza. And walk out of any interview that attempts to discover anything actually insightful about you.

[If you are a female you're in Hollywood you are more likely to "stay hot" by developing an obvious (i.e. visible) eating disorder, most likely fueled by a cocaine addiction, and flashing inappropriate body parts at events.]

---

For more insipid "news" courtesy of the Associated Press, I recommend you check out the other item from today "Tom Cruise Skips Paris News Conference". It's an illuminating exploration into the world of Tom Cruise as he shirks his professional responsibilities to buy his fake-baby some shit in a babystore. Don't miss the awkward and totally forced sub-story about what a major heterosexual player he is.

Somewhere in Iowa, There's a Scared, Sneaky Bulimic

http://abcnews.go.com/US/print?id=1888698

who's not doing his/her part to save the planet.
Plastic bags? At least use waxed paper.

Or better yet - tupperware.
They're reusable.

Why Does Blogger Force Me Through 'Word Verfication' to Comment on My OWN Posts?

I'm not bitching, I'm just sayin'..

Art Reflecting Life in the Form of a Comic

The above exchange occurred last Thursday evening and will, in all likelihood re-occur this Wednesday evening, before my weekend trip to Palm Springs for a doctor's appointment.

ISN'T IT WEIRD, THE TIGHT/HOT FACE YOU HAVE ALL DAY AFTER RUNNING?

UPDATE: I'm About to Go Out to Dinner & Have a Horrible Evening*

I'll recap when I get home late, bored, and pissed from spending the evening with an acquaintance & her fucking work colleague, with whom she is in town on a business trip.




*DrM, this will be of interest to you.

I Hate How Budget My Blog Looks

I wish it were more intuitive, how to tweak CSS pages.
I mean, I just want to put a randomly rotating image banner at the top of the page instead of the boring old text..And fix up some other little things. And add tags.

Is that too much to ask?

Sites I Like

"But what sites do you hit, ctrl-freak?" is a question I am rarely often asked.
Here's a sampling of some of the sites I hit with frequency:

• we make money not art
• coolhunting [this guy went to my grad program..fucking entrepreneurs]
• Adrants
• Towleroad
• jockohomo - datapanik
• Corporate Casual (I can't tell if this guy is a) a dick or b) funny. Perhaps c)both)

And so, so many others. But this shall suffice.

Speaking of Menstrual Cuddling

[Room goes silent]

We were speaking about that, weren't we?

I'd wear these:
[image from coloribus.com (obviously)]

Timesuck: Design Your Own Modernist Poster

This should occupy you for a decent chunk of the work day.

Righteous - Anne Coulter Could Go To Prison!

So that dumb ass is finally getting what's coming to her. [via Brad Blog via The Raw Story]

It would please me to no end to see Anne Coulter go to prison.

Anne, I hope you rot in prison. (She looks so scared in the picture, left.)


I close this with a quote from Ms. Coulter:

"My libertarian friends are probably getting a little upset now but I think that's because they never appreciate the benefits of local fascism."---MSNBC 2/8/97

Let's hope she can appreciate the benefits of a tattoo applied with a searing ballpoint pen and bunkmates.

Cleaning Up

My post about that pig girl at Georgia Tech [her name is Ruth Malholta] who is protesting the school's Tolerance Policy because it infringes on her rights as a "Christian" to be a bigot will come later today...

I'm a little behind - I've got a good friend coming to visit LA and stay as a guest and the place is a mess. Look,

Reward if you find my watch

Seriously, I've got to clean my place top to bottom (sort of a spring cleaning, you know?) and I've got a haircut in 40 mins.

Otherwise, it seems a slow news day -- nothing juicy celebrity gossip-wise, ditto politics.
(Yes, I know Jake Gyllenhaal is NOT coming out as gay with that twink friend of his.)

More: I Love Rollergirls

These chicas sound fun:

Aida Baby
Aidee H. Dee
Althea N. Hell
Ampukate
Andromeda Sprain
Anita Mandalay
Anna Wrecks Ya (double zing!)


That's just part of the A's from the US/Canada RollerGirls' Master Roster...


thanks, KK..not 4 nothin'..per usual :|

Who Says The Youth of Today Are Apathetic?

Elizabeth Cady Stanton.
Susan B. Anthony.
Alice Stone Blackwell.
Lucretia Coffin Mott.
Carrie Chapman Catt (below).

Suffragist and Peace Advocate

Add to this list, Zoe & Leslie Hinkle.

Why?

Because this mother/daughter duo are, like the aforementioned, fighting for the rights of young women everywhere in a movement that will impact future preteens for generations to come.

Well, not everywhere, but at Steams Elementary school in Upper St. Clair. And not for rights like suffrage (they're minors after all) or for fair treatment in classrooms, but for something equally important to 10 year olds.

Miniskirts.

Zoe & her mother are fighting the cruel and unjust policy of the school that deems skirts that "rise to mid thigh" are unacceptable.

Cheers to them for fighting the good fight.

10 year old girls should be able to experience what it feels like for one's buttocks (and bits) to be fractions-of-an-inch away from the eyes of classmates and the wood of desks.
It's important.

The future 4th grade sluts of the world will one day look back and honor Zoe & Leslie for their courageous battle.. Although by then, 10 year olds will probably wear Mylar thongs to class, right?

Or does that make me sound old?


[Addendum: Gross/creepy. With folks like this out there, I can see why Zoe's mom would help in her daughter's fight.]

Um, "Do-Overs" Are Kind of Second Grade, Don't You Think?

The Dumbest Man on Earth would be amusing if he weren't in the position of running the nation I live in. Like if he was a grade-school busdriver, he'd be awesome. He can't even get his public speaking events right. From the article,

"Bush, often the first to admit that he's not a great orator, got it right the second time."

Wish the same were true for his presidential term. Think of this, if you performed your job as poorly as he does his, don't you think your ass would be fired pretty quickly?

He's your boyfriend

You Are Beautiful

This is the sort of art I like: guerrilla, interactive, simple, and makes me love people.
Check it out.


[props to Eyebeam reBlog]

Fuck You Too, Bahamas

NASSAU, Bahamas (Reuters)...Rallied by the Save the Bahamas Initiative, which maintains that family values are undermined by gay couples, hundreds of demonstrators waved banners saying, "If you're gay, stay away," and "Even animals have more sense than homosexuals."

But What If They're Hot?

[via Towleroad]

Pearl Reckless, Meg Abbich, & Sophie Opath

I wish I knew some Rollergirls.

My Mother Can Use The Internets

To send me 1 sentence (runon) emails that can go for 3 lines (no caps no punctuation) and funny little "hahas" like this:
I'm so proud of her.

Not Nearly Hard or Long Enough

And why do we care about this anyway?

Web Junk: Ninja Felines, Trading Stuff, LuftBallons

Samurai Kittens is a good game for bad people and it's somewhat addictive when one is bored.






This site is hysterical - some Canadian dude is trying to barter to get a house. He started with a red paper clip and has so far worked his way up to a recording contract at a professional studio...






Damn damn damn! How did I miss this???!

Literally knocked you out? I saw your legs twitching

[File under Further Proof the Universe is Sometimes Fair]

Put Your Vices in Perspective

Wow. 40, 000 pills? Averaging 3.5 pills a day for years? This is either impressive or scary (or both) -- "At the peak, the man was taking an estimated 25 pills every day for four years."
He must have been quite a character at parties.

And here I am trying to cut my coffee intake down to 1 cup per day because of what it's doing to my teeth. Sometimes I am a boy scout. It's all relative.

Well Put

I couldn't have stated this truth any more succinctly [from LAist interview].

Q:As an East Coast-based writer, what has surprised you about Los Angeles?
A: The frighteningly low velocity of idea exchange in casual conversation.

-Vanessa Grigoriadis

Frighteningly low velocity of idea exchange....

Yeah, totally. But whatever, it's raining AGAIN today.

Anonymous Posters

Are clever.

But I am more clever. Through some fancy hackwork I managed to traceback the IP address of one of you. More web research yielded this photo of the funny (but spelling-handicapped) commenter.

I love ctrl-freak!
-Anonymous

More Proof That the Universe is (Sometimes) Fair

2 Observations about this 'news' item:

1.) This headline applied years ago when Helms was still active in politics.

2.) As a fellow human being, I do feel sympathy for his family (I guess) but I still hope he rots in hell.

If you think that's harsh, just reacquaint yourself with some of the gems of wisdom uttered by Helms before he came down with dementia.

"I was with some Vietnamese recently, and some of them were smoking two cigarettes at the same time. That's the kind of customers we need!"

"Democracy used to be a good thing, but it has gotten into the wrong hands."

"We've got to have some common sense about a disease transmitted by people deliberately engaging in unnatural acts."

--on why he opposed approval of the Ryan White CARE act, which funds AIDS research

"I've been portrayed as a caveman by some. That's not true. I'm a conservative progressive, and that means I think all men are equal, be they slants, beaners or niggers."

"Mr. Chief Justice, I plead with Senators to look around and see what Bill Clinton's scandal has wrought. National debate is now a national joke. Children tell their parents and teachers that it's okay to lie, because the President does it. Our citizens tune out in droves, preferring the daily distractions of everyday life to an honest appraisal of the depths to which the Presidency of the United States has sunk."
- in closed door impeachment statement

"The New York Times and Washington Post are both infested with homosexuals themselves. Just about every person down there is a homosexual or lesbian."

"All Latins are volatile people. Hence, I was not surprised at the volatile reaction."

-- After Mexicans protested his visit in 1986

"Homosexuals are weak, morally sick wretches."

-- 1995 radio broadcast

"They should ask their parents if it would be all right for their son or daughter to marry a Negro."

-- In response to Duke University students holding a vigil after Martin Luther King, Jr. was assassinated, 1968

Yeah, good luck Jesse when you meet your maker. You're going to need it bro.